


Arthurs a girl?!

by AnimeWolfGirl



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Cheesy name but don't know what else to put, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-16
Updated: 2019-09-23
Packaged: 2020-05-13 03:19:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 9,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19242763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnimeWolfGirl/pseuds/AnimeWolfGirl
Summary: When England's secret get out the other nations choose to keep the fact they know a secret from her while showing increasing interest her.





	1. Chapter 1

England had to stop himself from sighing in relief as he locked his front door of his house. Finally, the nightmare of the week was nearly over, he’d hardly got a wink of sleep thanks to paperwork and on top of that one of his top politicians was involved in a scandal that was currently being investigated meaning he had to deal with that as well. He hadn’t had a chance to wear casual clothes either and his usual ones were just so stuffy.

After a half-hearted attempt to write a shopping list several yawns convinced him that he could go without dinner that night settling instead for a piece of bread and left over humous.

He made his way to the bathroom to take a quick bath before he went to bed. He turned on the tap and poured in some green liquid into it. He couldn’t quite remember what it was called since the label was all in French (he’d got it from Francis on his birthday) but it was something along the lines of a bubble bath and he’d used it several times before. Letting the bath fill up Arthur went and fetched a book to read before undressing.

He looked himself over in the large mirror on the opposite side of the bathroom. You see _he_ was technically a _she_. Honestly, it didn’t bother him much which pronoun anyone used for her but in here mind she more often than not slipped into using the ‘him’ and ‘he’ she’d heard used so many times, to her best knowledge this wasn’t because she was bigender or anything like that.

When Scotland came around alone and used the feminine pronouns, she hardly noticed the change and vice versa when other countries came around, she hardly noticed the shift to masculine pronouns. After centuries of ponding ever since William had first ordered and showed her how to hide her gender, she’d came to the conclusion it was because she identified more closely to her nation than anything else. Land masses didn’t have genders.

Still she chosen to hide under the façade of being male to everyone, even her rulers, excluding Scotland (who’d found out by accident), Australia (who’d gotten jealous of America leaving her to choice but to share her secret that she kept even from Alfred to make him calm down), Switzerland (don’t ask), Denmark (again don’t ask) and Wy (who had been out shopping with her and Sealand and experienced catcalling for the first time and gotten extremely upset).

Wearing padding to make her look more masculine, cutting her eyelashes, wearing a tight cloth to make her fatter chested and making her lips seem thinner where just easier than risking dealing with sexism plus she’d been pretending for so long she wasn’t exactly _how_ she’d tell people she was a girl. She still in her free time campaigned for women’s rights under a different name but felt somewhat detached from the debate when under the name ‘Arthur’. Like he was another person.

 

-Line Break-

 

America needed to talk to England. He’d thought the world meeting was this weekend not the next one and felt no motivation to go back to America and do more work but needed a place to crash.  He parked his car in front of Arthur's house and wondered up the drive finishing off a can of diet coke.

He (as per usual) didn’t bother knocking and opened the door through sheer force and looked around

"Iggy?" He asked, entering and looking around the grand house. As he ambled down the last of the corridors of the house, wondering if maybe the Englishman had gone to sleep or was out and that’s why he couldn’t find him.

His thoughts were proved wrong however when he passed one of the bathrooms door, where the sloshing sound of someone getting into a bath was coming from. Any other time or place, America would have turned around and watched a movie in the lounge and waited for the Brit but with his curiosity, the slightly ajar door just teasing him and the fact he’d had a few too many glasses of wine that day all convinced him to peak in.

America slowly opened the door not wanting to be spotted if it was (god forbid) Scotland who even if he’d explained the situation would probably go into overprotective mode and beat him up for trying to walk in on Arthur. A blush burned on his face as he began to stare- Wait. . .

Speechless, all the tipsy American could do was take out his phone, take a few photos to assure himself his drunken mind wasn’t just making it up and (as quietly as he could) dash out of the house his thoughts a blur.

One sentence eventually formed as he sat down in the cheap hotel room he’d eventually (and reluctantly) paid for through in the pandemonium of unformed feelings that was now his mind that repeated over and over again.

_England was a woman._

The American woke up sometime around late noon laughing at the funny (yet disturbing) dream he had before noticing he wasn’t in America anymore. Without a second thought he whipped out his phone and went straight to the gallery. His mouth dried as he saw it was in fact not a dream. There were pictures of England and he was a _she._

The photos weren’t overall exposing since they mostly just showed her back (America had seen dresses and tops that some women wore that revealed more) and the water was bubbly hiding anything else from view.

A dark blush appeared as he looked at the photos, he was hero leaving without saying anything would be one thing but taking pictures… He at that moment vowed never to drink again but for some reason he didn’t feel like deleting all of them, just the less blurry ones that revealed more.

“YO **u ArE** ThE d **A** _n_ CiNg QuEEn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Before his ringtone could continue any more (never get in a bet with Prussia) he quickly answered it.

“Hello hero America here!” he faked his usual tone not wanting to show how shaken he was.

“Greetings America this is- ” started the ever-polite tone.

“Japan! Dude, you’re like totally friends with England, right?” interrupted America.

“Well yes but I really need to talk to y- “

“Great I have something to ask you come to England ‘kay?!”

“Travel to England?”

“Yeah, thanks a tonne dude. We’ll meet at the airport!”

“Wait.” It was already too late as America had hung up the phone. Japan sighed wondering what he’d gotten himself into this time while trying to think of the politest way to tell his boss that he’d have to leave six days early to the world meeting.

 

“So, what is so important you had to ask me to come all the way here?” Japan asked slightly annoyed as he sat down of the hotel bed next to America.

“Well…” Alfred trailed off as if lost for words. Japan was alarmed, America always knew what to say or at least how to talk nonstop. America leaned closer to him creeping out Japan who scooted away. “Do you Iggy’s secrete?”

“If we’re talking about anything inappro - “ warned Japan as he leapt up blushing but stopped dead as America presented a picture on his phone.

“Iggy’s totally a chick.”

“Huh?” was all Japan could manage before looking at the picture with closer detail and feinting in embarrassment.

 

Was Japan had finally calmed down enough to process information (by this time it was late at night) they sat down again cross legged facing a printed-out version of the picture. (Printing out the picture in a public library was extremely nerve racking with Alfred blocking the printer and glaring at anyone who got too close and Japan looking as if he was going to feint so people brought him water on three sperate occasions thinking he was just too hot).

“Photoshop!” America slammed his hand down making Japan jump a mile. “I bet that’s what happened!”

“So, drunk you could photoshop it to such a high quality?” Japan raised an eyebrow.

“Well duh I’m the hero!” America reasoned. “We should send it to Estonia I bet he’ll know if it is or not.”

“No, you shouldn’t do that.” Japan was (once again) ignored as the American hit send.

  **If you have any particular preference as to what pairings you'd like to see go ahead. I wrote this first chapter ages ago and I have a feeling I based it on someone else's fanfic but can't find it so if you know it please comment so I can credit them for the premise.**

**Edit: The story I based this chapter on is 'America should learn how to knock'. Please check it out!**


	2. Chapter 2

England's eyes slowly opened as she groaned and stretched.

“What Godforsaken hour is this!” England snarled as she blinked several times trying to locate her bedside clock, slightly blinded from the light shining through the parted curtains (she was on the third floor of her house, so she hardly had to worry about anyone peaking in).

"It’s that late?” The brit shrieked as she jumped out of bed tripping over the duvet covers in her haste. The meeting started at 10:00 and it was already 8:00

You might think that this was plenty of time but (giving her unique situation) it is no surprise England payed a lot of attention to what she looked like.

It took a stupidly long time to cut her eyelashes that an angry fey had once cursed to regrow every night, tie something tightly around her breasts and add padding to stop her figure appearing too feminine before slipping on too big clothes and practicing the deeper voice she’d now grown used to using.

Eventually she gave up on the eyelashes as she occasionally did leave them without anyone normally noticing and only put in a little bit of padding around her body relying on the too big clothes to hide her figure.

 Hastily began stuffing a breakfast bar down her throats as she grabbed her paperwork and a notebook before running across London to the tube.

 

Standing at the back of the meeting room (having arrived early) America could still hardly accept what he'd discovered early on in the week. After the incident with Estonia the picture seemed to have made its way to every nations phone that had caused Japan to really have a long rant about how he’d messed up and _then_ Canada had shown up and joined in (seriously he could be scary when he wanted to be).

 It had been the main topic of discussion between nations and still appeared to be but they had the mind to stop talking about certain things when one of England’s better friends (including America but not including France who was joining in or more accurately leading one of said conversations) came within ear shot.

The entire world, for once, had all agreed on keeping Arthur out of the loop that they knew her secret each having their own motivation to do so (quite a few had been threatened by stronger nations to do so).

 

 

“Eek!” England yelled despite being surprised forcing her voice an octave or so lower than normal. Her paperwork that she’d been holding onto went everywhere falling on the two colliding nations like snow. “I’m sorry, Japan.”

“No, no. The fault is all mine.” For some reason Japan was sporting a slight blush that confused the Englishwomen greatly, was he feeling well? Meanwhile Japan was busy thinking of every single manga or anime he’d watched where the protagonist and their main tsundere love interest had bumped into each other in a similar fashion. “Here let me help you with your stuff.”

“Thank you.” England gave him her best smile, but he still wouldn’t meet her eye. “Say, we haven’t spoken to each other face to face in awhile would you like to pop round mine for a cupper after this?”

“Uh… well I have a lot of paperwork.” Kiku lied as he passed her the last of the papers.

“Right, maybe some other…” before she could continue Japan had half sprinted down the hall leaving her standing there very confused. Had she done something to offend him?

 

 

‘Russia’s has been staring at me for more than the majority of the meeting, Hungary has stolen the seat next to me that France usual sat on (no complaints there) and America or the Frog hasn’t tried to annoy me nearly as much as they normally would and instead (along with the majority of the other nations) joined in with Russia in his staring. Oh, Japan’s also giving me the cold shoulder, I feel I might have done something to offend everyone.’ Arthur finished the text to her brothers before turning back to the meeting that really wasn’t going places.

When the clock's hour hand (finally) landed on 11:55 pm everyone left to go eat lunch. England got up to go get himself a cup of tea in a cosy cafe that she was rather fond of and was a regular at.

As she left the hall and walked down the one of the hallways, she felt like he was being followed and wasn’t really surprised when he was abruptly slammed into the wall. Se winced ever so slightly and was about to yell when a hand was clamped over his mouth, muffling her angry and not PG words. Francis laughed and smirked towering over her seemingly just a little bit more than usual.

"Greetings, mon petit lapin we have not properly greeted each other yet have we?" France said as he grabbed England slim wrists with one hand while continuing to hold the other against her mouth, he brought her hand up to his face and kissed it giving a mock bow, she scowled up at him angrily with a blush of both anger and embarrassment forming.

"Mmph mmf!" England's muffled yell to be let go was ignored by the frog as he stared deeply into the glaring emerald eyes of his Angleterre. It was no big secret France swung both ways, but the problem was before he’d known England since they’d been children and the spark of his desire was somewhat dampened by their long history of nothing romantic really ever properly happening but learning such a fact as her gender was completely different relit his childhood longing.

So much it hurt.

This time it could work out, before they’d been cursed into being rivals but in this day and age it was different. It had too.

Suddenly he released England’s mouth enough for a ‘you git’ to make it out before going to slam their lips together. He stopped however when a bullet was shot expertly in the small gap between them causing him to jump back.

“Get away from him.” Switzerland demanded. He had known for a long time about England’s gender ever since the first time he’d saved her from Francis during the reopening of the Olympics and seen the padding that she’d expectantly wound around her chest and inquired about why she’d (or he’d as Switzerland had been under the impression at the time) would want to look more fat. “You should know better than to force yourself on an Englishman.”

“R-right.” Laughed Francis before stalking off quickly keeping one eye on the gun that had come very closed to killing him.

“Are you okay?” Switzerland didn’t have much emotion in his voice, but a little bit of concern could be made out… maybe.

“Yes, thank you. Not that I needed your help!” England informed him blushing before rushing off in the opposite way of the Frog leaving Switzerland standing on his own.

**Comment which ships you'd like to see.**


	3. Germany (part 1)

Tuesday started out normally enough, he had woken up, comforted Italy about a nightmare, sent Italy back home, had a brisk shower, woken up Gilbert, had a shower, yelled at Gilbert for falling asleep again, forced Gilbert to go take a shower and had made a breakfast of strictly sausages at his brother’s request. It was over this breakfast that the day had turned into a weird and memorable one.

“Bro have you read the email France sent you?”

“Swallow before you speak.” Ludwig had requested tiredly.

“So, have you?”

“I’m doing it now!”

He had read the text on the top of the E-mail first, his left eyebrow raising with every passing word he read much to Prussia’s amusement. Did he and the Frenchman actually think he’d fall for such a stupid prank? England was probably one of the least feminine people he had met in his life (Apart from his height of course).

Ludwig had decided to entertain his brother a little longer and clicked on the photo attached which he had thought was probably was just a picture of Francis holding a sign reading ‘prank’ or something.

His brain completely froze, running at the speed of a snail trying to do a handstand to figure out what he was seeing.

Gilbert got up and had walked behind his younger brother, looking at the picture on the screen.

 "See! England’s a woman! Kesesesese! Isn’t it totally awesome! She doesn’t look half bad either. Hang on a second… Francis has sent me it too! Oh, and Spain did as well I wonder how many people have it?" The Prussian cackled and wandered off to grab another pile of sausages making lewd comments about what he’d do with England while using the sausages as a metaphor.

His brother's comments eventually snapped Ludwig out of his frozen state, jump starting his mind back to its general speed.

England was a woman, female, not male at least not biologically (twenty-first century people don’t assume genders). This thought repeated itself constantly as Ludwig went about his day

 Naturally a query was soon raised in his mind. How had France got his hand on such a photo? It was obvious from the way the picture looked that England hadn't been aware of it being taken. This made his fist clench in anger, although he and England hadn't been on the best of terms since the blitz that didn't mean he wanted pictures of a naked England floating around, that was just harsh not to mention slightly degrading.


	4. Germany (part 2)

**I used to google translate to get the German so sorry for butchering the language with what I assume is bad grammar.**

England’s luck really couldn’t get any worse. Why couldn’t she just reach one simple café? To be fair (once again) she hadn’t been looking where she was going and instead had been staring at her phone like some modern-day teenager waiting for her brothers to reply to her message, allowing muscle memory to lead her to the café.

Apparently, she’d been about to walk across the road when a car suddenly swerved into view. Honestly, it was no big deal even if she was run over it wasn’t like it would _kill_ her, but she was still glad when a hand grabbed her by the collar and pulled her out of the way.

“Thank you, I really should look where I’m…” she stopped as she turned to face _Germany_ of all people. Well that wasn’t fair it was the more the fact it was a nation that had saved that annoyed England.

“It’s fine.” Was all Germany could manage. He had to stop himself from remarking how light England was. Of course, she was. He’d seen how skinny England actually was. Oh great, now he was thinking about the picture again. He could feel his face slowly turning bright red. “It’s their fault for going so fast, driving like an Italian.”

“Quite.” On a better day she might have stood up for her citizen but today she was just too fed up. “Did you need something?”

“No, I was just going to the place I’d agreed to meet Prussia at.”

“Hm,”

“…Lebewohl, Arthur.”

“Yes, goodbye and thanks again.” Arthur gave a small wave before crossing the road cautiously.

Then came the awkward few minutes when they both realized they were walking the same way and had no choice but to keep their dignity and walk in silence for the next ten minutes before eventually Arthur spoke.

“Ludwig?”

“Ja?”

“You and Japan are friends, right?”

“Ja.” Germany was confused, why on earth was he bringing that up now?

“Well he’s been giving me the cold shoulder recently; I was wondering if I’ve done anything to offend him. Speaking of which most people have been acting strangely but Kiku is one of my only friends so… you know.” Arthur trailed off practically blushing his face off. “Not that I care, I just think its odd.” He snapped quickly.

“I don’t know, no ones mentioned anything.” Lied Ludwig refusing to make eye contact. He thought for a second of how the entire scenario might be affecting Arthur, everyone suddenly treating her differently so suddenly.

“I see, maybe there is a bug going around,” the clueless Englishwomen continued. “Everyone’s face has been really red recently, like they have a fever, I hope it’s not another plague.”

“Ja, that would be bad.”

Another minute or so of awkward walking.

“Your city is very beautiful.” Ludwig spoke but immediately regretted it. Surely awkward silence was better than an awkward conversation?

“It is, isn’t it?” Arthur agreed brimming with pride before turning sour. “Though it wouldn’t be here if you’d had your way.”

“…” Ludwig thought back to the blitz and winced; awkward silence was _definitely_ better than this.

“Sorry that was uncalled for,” Arthurs apology sounded genuine. She always tried to be more polite when the meetings where hosted in England.

“You don’t have a memorable for it, do you?” _‘Stupid Ludwig! Why couldn’t you just let the subject drop!’_ Germany thought angrily to himself the second the words left his lips. Normally, he was less clumsy, what was going on with him?

“No not really, I do have one for the firemen though, I guess that sort of counts.”

“Why not?”

“Simple, this is all that is needed to remember it.” England waved her hand dramatically.

“A Mac Donald’s?” Germany raised an eyebrow. Maybe England was spending to much time around America. He didn’t know why but the very thought of them hanging out _alone_ made him feel… irritated?

“What?” England turned around to see where he’d been pointing in closer detail. “No! I mean the very fact London and the other cities that where bombed are still here is enough for me.”

“I see,” Germany didn’t really see but disagreeing would just make things awkward. “Are you going to meet someone as well?”

A crowd of people walking towards them forced the two nations to go so close that their hands brushed against each other. Germanys face was practically a tomato and steam was pouring out of his ears.

“No,”

“Sorry what?” Germany was snapped out of his daze. He hadn’t said anything aloud, had he?

“I’m not meeting anyone.” England gave him a concerned look. “Are you feeling well? Your face is all heated up.”

Before Germany could reply England was practically tackled by a figure from behind.

“Your spending your lunch break alone, that’s seriously not awesome!”

“Prussia?!” exclaimed England at the same Germany yelled ‘Brother?!’.

“How long have you been here?” Germany demanded. “And get off…” He stopped himself from saying ‘her’. “…him.” He forcefully dragged his brother away from the Brit.

“A while. I was at the pub we were supposed to meet at, but you weren’t there so the awesome me went to look for you!”

“Why didn’t you say anything!”

“Because you should have felt the awesome presence of the awesome me with me having to say anything awesome.” Prussia explained like it was the most reasonable thing in the world. “Anyway, that’s not the point!” he slipped his arm over England’s shoulders. “If your lonely you can hang out with the awesome me.”

“Thanks for the offer but I’d hate to impose myself on you for any longer.” England’s words seemed polite, but her voice had a certain tired edge to it.

“Come on it’s the awesome me I’m fine with it.” Prussia _winked._ Of all the things he could do.

“Bruder, Ich denke England will sein allein,” (translation: Brother I think England wants to be alone) Germany cut it flashing an apologetic look at the female nation as he once again forced Prussia away from her.

“Aber Bruder…” (translation: But brother…)

“Wir verlassen.” (translation: We are leaving)

“Verwöhnen Sie Sport.” (translation: Spoil sport)

 


	5. Chapter 5

** I’ve finally got my head round where most of the countries will be, so I’ve decided to write it up. Comment any that you want to see that I’ve missed or any you think should belong to a different group. **

** (Some countries are in more than one group) **

** Has a crush on Arthur since finding out she was a girl: **

** America **

** Japan  **

** Germany  **

** Prussia  **

** Spain  **

** Italy (both North and South) **

** Russia  **

** China  **

** Canada  **

** Norway **

** Switzerland? (not really sure how I feel about shipping them but its probably because I find his character hard to write) **

** Already had a crush on Arthur: **

** Portugal  **

** Denmark **

** France  **

** Romania **

** Protect England club: **

** Portugal  **

** Lichtenstein  **

** Switzerland? (see previous note) **

** Hungary (I’m thinking of also writing her as having her develop feeling for England but I’m not sure) **

** Scotland  **

** Wales **

** Ireland  **

** Northern Ireland  **

** Australia  **

** New Zealand  **

** Shippers (I’d really like to add some more on here but can’t think of any): **

** Hong Kong (secretly wants China and England to get married) **

** Belgium (rooting for her brother and Spain) **

** Doesn’t understand what the fuss is about: **

** SeaLand  **

** Wy **

** Thinks the entire situation is hilarious: **

** India **

** Ireland **

 

**Other notes: In terms of chapter the only ones I have planned properly is a Drunk!England x Prussia with quite a lot of fluff at the end and a mapletea vs UsUk chapter**

 


	6. MapleTea vs UsUk (part 1?)

“…and it also must be why she hated it when I called her a ‘damsel in distress’ ‘cause she was technically one y’know.” America continued his rant despite having forgotten who he was talking to.

“I’m pretty sure Arthurs never been in ‘distress’ or at least enough to want _your_ help.” The voice was quiet enough you couldn’t here the annoyance in it.

“Nuh-uh, I’m the hero, the go to man,” America explained. “Its my job to look after people in distress even if its grumpy Arthur-if-that-even-is-her-real-name. Anyway, who are you?”

“Canada,”

“Who?”

“Your brother.”

“Uh…”

“The guy who’s treating you to lunch.”

“Bro, how could I forget!” Alfred put down his coke and ruffled Canadas hair. “I’ll totally like take you to McDonalds to apologise!”

“We’re in a McDonalds.”

“…so we are.”

“See this is why I like England; her apologies are genuine.”

“What was that?”

“Oh, joy you actually heard me… I said I like England; her apologies are genuine!”

“Wait Canada you don’t _like_ like her do you?” America asked. If it wasn’t for the embarrassment Canada now faced, he might have noticed the dangerous tone.

“Maybe I do, why what is it to you?” Canada challenged.

“Nothing… I’m completely fine with that.”

 

(ten minutes later)

 

“Your probably just remind her of France!” yelled America chucking another of the plastic chairs to where Canada was crouching behind the now abandoned counter wondering to himself how long it’d be till the police showed up.

“Well I bet your idea of a stupid date would be taking her to McDonalds!”

“So?!”

“Your clueless… England deserves better!” Canada embraced his inner hockey-rage to through the chair back.

“That’s not true!”

“Give me one good reason, why?”

“’cause I’m the hero.”

“For the last time that’s not a reason! Who was there for her during the Blitz, and don’t even talk about the planes you sent I’m talking about _personally_ there for her, who looked after her after your stupid, stupid revolution, who’s part of the commonwealth…”

“Who has a name she can’t be bothered remember half the time?!”

_Ow, that one stung._

America was about to leap at Canada, realizing most of his arguments where limited to the fact no-one could remember who Canada was and weren’t very strong which therefore meant should, naturally, resort to violence.

“Hey… is that England?” Canada asked suddenly his voice wary.

“Think you can get me that easily, bro?” America chuckled, “The second I turn around you’ll hit me over the head with a hockey stick or somethin’”

“No, I mean really, she’s with Germany.”

America spun round to see in fact Canada was right, Arthur was walking down the street next to Ludwig engaging in what seemed to be a pleasant chat, though Germany was… _blushing._

America growled as he thought the conversation might be about when suddenly England looked _right at him_ and pointed. Without a second thought Canada pulled him behind the counter with him and muffled his voice.

 

“Okay, its been a few minutes there probably gone.” Canada let go of America (since when he had been so strong?!).

“Why’d you do that?” America demanded.

“Because knowing you, you’d want to go barge in on their chat,”

“Well it’s obvious Germanys intentions are less that honourable!”

“I can say the same for you.”

“I can’t stand round here... I’m going after them!” Alfred didn’t give his brother time to react before he ran off. Canada didn’t bother running after him though, he’d seen someone he was sure would intervene without any help from him and he was right. Just as America was about to round the bend that bring him onto the same road as England, he slammed into someone.

“G’day mate,” came the all too familiar voice, “Now would you mind telling me what you wanted with mum?”

 **This chapters seems really messy to me but when I tried to change it, it seemed to be to bulky so... you know.**   ****

**Like a week of nothing then two chapters (plus a note chapter thingy) in two days. I'm really random with updating.**


	7. Portugal (part 1)

**Note: during this conversation Portugal is speaking Portuguese and Spain is speaking Spanish. Since they both know each other’s languages as well as their own so it works.**

“Your being childish,” Portugal scolded his brother Spain as they walked down the streets together. “I don’t see why England being a girl makes so much difference, you’ve been hanging around France and Prussia too much for your own good.”

“I bet your just bitter because she never told you about it.” Spain teased cheerfully. Portugal quickened his pace and refused to meet his brothers’ eyes. “I’m right aren’t I? You and England, have never waged war against each other or participated in wars on opposite sides as independent states since the signing of the Treaty of Windsor and even before that you were good friends.”

“It’s oldest alliance in the world that is still in force,” Portugal automatically familiar pride entering his voice. He always like to brag about it. “But that doesn’t make any difference, I see no need to suddenly love her just because of a change in gender!”

“Well, that’s fine less competition for me.” Spain laughed.

“Hmmm,” Portugal replied nonchalantly. ‘ _That’s not what I said. I simply don’t see the point in developing feelings because she’s biologically a girl_.’ But he kept his thoughts to himself.

They carried on walking in silence for a minute before a familiar ‘ping’ sound caused both nations to halt and take out their phones.

“It’s not mine.” Spain sighed. “No one ever seems to message me.”

“I’m sure that’s not true.” Portugal gave a sympathetic smile. “I need to go now, brother. Hungary wants to meet up for some reason and since we don’t really talk to each other I expect its serious.”

“You’re leaving me?!” cried Spain causing a few of the pedestrians near them to start muttering ‘damn tourists’ and other phrases to that effect.

“Be quieter.” Portugal flicked his brother’s forehead. “You’re causing a scene.”

“But brother…” whined the nation rubbing the place Portugal had flicked.

“Go pester Romano or someone.” Portugal suggested.

“I guess I could, I just really wanted to ask you where you stood with England.”

“It touches me how much you care, oh brother of mine.”

“Yeah, sorry about that.”

“Whatever, I’m not bothered _that_ much,” Portugal admitted, for once not feeling up to guilt-tripping his brother into doing anything. “Well goodbye.”

“Bye~”

** Note **

**Portugal:**

**I haven’t ever written a fanfic with Portugal in before so I’m not really sure how to write him, so I tried to make his character as bland as possible just in case any of you have any suggestions on what his personality could be like. I’m thinking he’s kind of like Spain but more serious and down to earth.**

 


	8. Arthur protection squad

**Portugal’s name in this will be Miguel Fernandez Carriedo because I’ve seen him named as such in other places.**

**New Zealand’s name will be James Green for the same reason.**

**Australia will be Kyle Smith (again) for the same reason.**

**Scotland’s name is Alistair (again again) for the same reason.**

**Wales name is Dylan (again again again) for the same reason.**

**Can’t decide on Northern Irelands name just yet so I’m just having everyone call them ‘North’,**

Miguel slumped down onto the cafe’s plastic chairs taking off his drenched coat while silently cursing English weather, he didn’t see how Arthur could stand it at all.

It only took a few seconds for a waiter to come up to him.

“Do you wish to make an order, sir?” he asked with a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“I’m actually waiting for some people to show up,” Portugal explained as cheerfully as he could to appear more likable. “Is it okay if I wait to see if they show up?”

“Shouldn’t be too much trouble sir, just so you know if I’m busy you can go up to the counter and order yourself.”

As the waiter walked away Portugal glanced around the near-deserted restaurant and withheld a snort at the thought of the waiter being busy.

The only other customers were a young-looking couple who were desperately trying to quiet down a crying baby at the same time as keeping an eye on a toddler who was waving around a wooden toy sword and two teenage boys huddled over a laptop sat under the ‘free wifi’ sign, their coffee (no doubt the cheapest on the menu) lying cold untouched.

Miguel smiled at the family wincing slightly in sympathy as the baby threw food all over the mother’s top.

His attention soon shifted to the toddler, as he watched it experiment with different ways to swing the toy sword which, in actuality, was the size of an average dagger and thought back to when Arthur had taught him how to fight while battling Spain.

His smile widened at the memory, as much as he cared about his brother now, he couldn’t help but feel glad that their joint hatred for Spain had driven them closer together.

His thoughts now on Arthur he frantically started worrying what she was doing. Now her secret was out any number of nations might try to make a move on her. He shivered at the thought of them succeeding.

His thoughts were cut off when he heard the bell attached to the door ring signalling another country had arrived.

“Hello,” New Zealand beamed at Portugal before flagging down the waiter. “Can you get me a latte please?”

“Most certainly.”

 “Thanks.”

He pulled out a chair and plonked down opposite Portugal.

“You seem to be in chipper spirits today, James.” Miguel pointed out as the country promptly started humming.

“Uh-huh me and Kyle made a bet about who could get here first but, his taxi got stuck in traffic.” New Zealand sniggered.

“Huh, guess I should have guessed it was something like that knowing you two.” Portugal half muttered. “Remind me who we’re waiting for.”

“Um…. Hungary, Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland and Australia.” New Zealand counted them off one by one with his fingers. Upon realizing he’d used the country names he glanced round to make sure no one had been listening in.

“Thanks,” Portugal twiddled his thumbs. This was weird, he’d never really talked with James one to one before.

“Here is your latte, sir.”

“T-.” James was cut off as someone burst through the doorway, skidding across the floor unable to slow down.

They smashed into one of the tables causing the waiter to run to there aid.

“Are you okay?” he asked obviously worried.

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine,” Australia waved him off as he stood up properly and glanced around the room.

“Tēnā koe!” greeted James smirking. “Have fun in the traffic?”

“For God’s sake!” Australia groaned walking over to the table and sitting down. “I knew I should have run!”

James fake gasped in shock.

“Blasphemy!”

Australia choose to ignore him and turn to Miguel.

“G’day mate,” Kyle managed to swallow down his anger to give a half smile.

“Olá,” Portugal barely got the greeting out before James started bickering with Kyle again leaving him with a sense of awkwardness.

 

Not soon after four more people burst into the café.

“I told you we’d get here late!” Alistair snapped.

“Well sorry that I obeyed the speed limit.” Dylan spoke sarcastically. For a second Portugal mistook him for Arthur.

“Both of you shut up!” Hungary hit them both over the head.

“Elizabeta! That hurt.” Dylan fake sobbed.

“Crazy women,” hissed Alistair

All three of them and Northern Ireland who had been quiet during the exchange all sat down, Alistair having to put together another table to make room.

 

“Okay, I suppose you all know why you’re here?” Hungary asked. A chorus of agreeing noises answered her. “Okay then let’s get started!”

 

**Okay so I’ve tried to write the rest of this chapter several times, but it always seems cringy and slow paced so I’m just basically going to explain a few things here.**

**I will explain these in later chapter so if you don’t feel like reading them just skip them (sorry for being lazy I tried my best I promise):**

**-They’re meeting to discuss how to protect England**

**-Romania isn’t invited for the sole reason Hungary in cannon hates him their relationship has been described as one of a cat and a dog. It is also said that due to her dislike of Romanians, she would name her dogs after them don’t know why that’s a bad thing but oh well.**

**-Portugal is worried his crush on England will be found out and he’ll be kicked out of the group**

**-I've finally settled on Alice definitely being Arthurs name. For awhile I considered Arthuretta since its the female version of the name Arthur but I find it kind of a weird name and according to google it was never really widely used.**

**Now for some questions I’d appreciate some help on if possible:**

**-What should I call Northern Ireland?**

**-Any idea’s what England’s relationship with her brothers are? (I get the idea she’s closest with Wales but that’s probably because it’s the only other country in the UK I visit regularly and know people from).**

**-Does anyone know about Northern Ireland and the republic of Irelands current relationship? (I was in the opinion that the divide wasn’t that messy after the troubles ended and before Brexit (this story is set before Brexit because I’m really sick of it) but, recently on the news I heard someone say people who aren’t from Ireland don’t understand how messy the divide is so now I’m honestly beyond confused)**

**That’s all I can remember for now. This chapter really isn’t interesting at all.**

**Sorry.**


	9. Update

**This isn't a chapter just letting you guys know that I've been on a holiday in Wales recently which is why I haven't updated.**

 

**I'll probably get another chapter done by the end of the week but I have a few other things coming up (including my birthday, yay!) so I might be inactive for awhile. Sorry for the delay and thank you for being so patient.**

 

**Thanks for reading.**


	10. Portugal (part 2)

Arthur sighed as she looked out of the window of the conference hall. For the first time that day it seemed no one’s eyes were on her, probably because several small fights had broken out thanks to her brothers unexpected appearance who all seemed to be in a very provoking mood.  

She was just admiring a robin who had landed on the branch next to the window she’d actually considered using as a way to escape the meeting previously, when she felt two hands cover her eyes.

She withheld a groan thinking it must’ve been Francis again.

“Guess who!” came a cheery voice that instantly lifted her spirits.

“Vlad!” she whirled round and smiled.

“Aww,” Romania pouted. “You must have cheated.”

“Uhh… sure,” Arthur eventually answered.

“Anyways, I was wondering if you’d like to test out the totally amazing new spell I’ve been working on, like tonight or something.”

“Aren’t you going to hang out with Bulgaria?” Arthur asked confused, he was sure the two of them had been sharing a hotel room.

“I do that allllll the time,” explained Romania. “But I haven’t hung round with you or Nor for like _for ever_.”

“I suppose your right… fine, I suppose I don’t have too much work to be doing,” Arthur caved in, to his friend’s puppy dog eyes. “I’ll invite Lukas around my place and then we can check out this oh, so amazing spell you’ve discovered.”

Romania was regretting bringing up Norway, but he was also happy that he’d get some time with Arthur. He could always arrive early to have some time alone with him. Afterall he’d had a crush on Arthur for years, he could wait awhile longer.

“Sounds like a plan,” he gently patted Arthur on the back. “In terms of time, I can get there around e-.”

Suddenly, he was cut off as Hungary pushed him out the way.

“I hate to interrupt but I remember Portugal saying he wanted Arthur here to come around for a sleepover.” Hungary spoke with a forced smile. Romania glared at his rival irritated.

“Really? Thanks for telling me Elizabet. We don’t see each other face to face very much anymore…” Arthur mused before turning to Romania. “Could we perhaps cancel tonight and meet up another time?”

Hungary shot Vladimir a smug look.

“Sure,” Vladimir forced out. “I’ll go see when Nor is free.”

“Thank you and I apologise for pushing you aside like this.” Arthur gave him a guilty look. “I’ll go find now Miguel.”

 

He then left the two to no doubt argue.

 

Portugal meanwhile was practically falling asleep in his chair. He glanced at the clock. Another hour before the nations would leave the room and the sorry attempt for a meeting.

He jumped slightly when someone tapped him on the shoulder.

“Sorry for interrupting you Miguel but…”

“Artie!” he smiled and hugged the nation resulting in Arthurs face to go very red as she pushed him off her. She didn’t complain though more than used to her friend’s clingy behaviour.

“So… Hungary was saying you wanted to invite me round tonight?” Arthur scratched the back of her head awkwardly.

Portugal was confused for a few second before he caught sight of Hungary’s mad gesturing in the background.

“Yes… yes, I did,” he spoke slowly nodding his head and narrowing his eyes. He was supposed to be sharing a room with his brother, but he’d just blackmail him into going and paying for a different one.

“Ah, okay. So, what time should I come?”

“I was wondering if we could actually look around town straight after the meeting then go back to my place.” Improvised Portugal. Arthur thought about it for a second.

“Sounds good but I’d quite like to get changed first so maybe we could meet up half an hour after it ends.”

“Yeah, that’s fine,” Portugal was just relieved he hadn’t rejected the idea completely.

“So, where should we meet?”

“’ll pick you up.” Miguel offered. “I’ll pay for a cab to take use wherever.”

“There’s really no need,” Arthur insisted. “In fact, as your host I should be doing that. Cabs round here are hardly cheap.”

“Take it as my payment for my personal tour guide.” Miguel winked at him.

“Fine… So long as I can pay for whatever else comes up.”

Portugal was about to object but realised there’d be no swaying her opinion, she was to stubborn for her own good sometimes.

Before either of them could continued Germany slammed his fists on the table and brought order to the meeting once more.

 

It was half seven and standing before Arthurs white door Miguel was nervous. He was wearing a thin olive-green shirt with the first few buttons left open, black jeans and a light brown coat plus gloves. Not knowing if Arthur was expecting him to dress casual or formal it had been the best choice as it seemingly fit in the middle.

It was funny, he always stressed so much before spending time with Arthur but as soon as they were faced to face all his worries seemed to melt away.

He took a deep breath and knocked.

“I’m coming!” came the muffled reply from within. “Just wait a second.”

“’Kay.” Portugal called back. After what seemed like a blink of an eye and a few hundred years the door opened.

Arthur was wearing a Milford style dark blue coat that reached her ankles and had a Hufflepuff scarf wrapped round her neck.

“Sorry to keep you waiting.” She apologised as she stepped out and locked the door.

“It’s no trouble.” Miguel assured her. “So, what do you have in mind for tonight Mister Tour guide.”

Arthur scowled at the nickname, but Portugal knew in reality she didn’t mind. England was just trying to protect her honour.

“Well, there showing a film I’d like to see showing later to night at a cinema near here but before that I was wondering if you’d like to take a stroll round a market open this evening. I’ve never visited it myself but since its so close to my London house it seems a shame. Then we could grab a bite to eat somewhere.” Arthur told him her face light up as she led him down the cobble stone path leading up to her house.

“Sounds like a plan.” Portugal agreed as they reached the road. “What film is it.”

“Well its about a book I like ‘Mortal Engines’ I haven’t seen any reviews so it might not be any good,” she admitted before hastily adding more. “Of course, if you don’t want to see it that’s fine!”

“No, no, it sounds nice.” He assured her. “How far away is the market.”

“Not far enough away to take a cab.” She replied an evil glint in her eyes. “It’s only five minutes away at worst.”

“You planned this.” He narrowed his eyes.

Arthur smiled innocently.

 

The market itself was nice despite being a small affair, Portugal brought a few chocolates to give to friends and a snow globe and secretly brought Arthur a necklace with a delicately crafted silver rose hanging off it. Arthur had tried to reject the present saying it was just wasting her friend’s money but thanked him for it none the less and proceeded to wear it for the rest of the night.

 

Arthur ended up being disappointed with the film and they both left early. It was still wasn’t time for them to go to their dinner reservation, so they walked round aimlessly before wandering into a Waterstones book shop.

England brought Miguel several books he wanted him to read and brought himself a few others.

They then went to the restaurant before hailing a cab and driving back to Miguel’s hotel at sometime past ten.

Arthur then requested to use Portugal’s shower and changed into his pyjamas before coming into the lounge where Miguel was sat on the sofa eating popcorn waiting for Arthur so they could start their Doctor Who watching.  

“Ready?” asked Miguel.

“Yep, I must warn you I might drop off. I’m quite tired.” Admitted Arthur.

Suddenly an idea popped into Portugal’s head.

He stared at Arthur with a serious look in his eye and patted his lap.

“You can rest your head here.” He told her.

 

“Dammit!” Alfred growled as he peered through his binoculars. It had taken a few minutes of blushing on Arthurs part and determination on Miguel’s part but finally the Englishwomen gave up and lay on the couch her head resting on a pillow on Miguel’s lap. “Fight back Arthur!”

“Please, stop being such a creep,” begged Mathew half-heartedly.

“But Mattie…” whined Alfred swirling round to face him.

“Seriously brother there just friends, okay?” Mathew sighed. “Your so possessive, I bet no one will ever like you.”

Luckily America didn’t pick up on the last bit and instead started to rant to himself.

“I couldn’t stop Germany either! Seriously, Australia is so annoying sometimes. I bet he has a crush on her to!” he snapped.

“Kyle calls her ‘mum’,” Canada pointed out turning away from his phone. “Unless he’s into some weird stuff I doubt he feels romantically for her…. And your still not playing attention.”

Canada sighed and went back to scrolling through Instagram smiling to himself when he saw the photos Miguel and Arthur had posted, glad they’d had a good time.

 

**An update! What is this? A miracle?**

**Seriously thanks for all you guys patience with my updates.**

**I was really tempted to write Arthur and Miguel going on an actual date but had to stop myself.**

**The temptations of porteng are strong.**

**Might write a porteng one shot or something just to get it out of my system. Any suggestion for settings?**

**Oh! And the ‘Milford style dark blue coat that reached her ankles’? That’s actually a description of the coat Sherlock wears (or at least how I remember it).**

**I feel I’m kind of making America a jerk but its done now so ¯\\_(** **ツ** **)_/¯.**

**And yes, I have just found I can’t write Romania’s character very well which is a shame because I really like his character design, personality and relationship with Arthur.**

**Also, I know I switch between feminine and masculine pronouns with Arthur/Alice. Its because I’m so used to writing him as ‘he’ and do it automatically. Plus, in this story Arthur doesn’t care much about pronouns so it doesn’t matter really.**

**The bit about Portugal basically blackmailing Spain is cannon as he tell Romano Spain can’t be rude to him since he knows so many embarrassing stories about him or something along those lines, if I remember correctly.**

**As always comment any ships you want to see which I’ve missed out, doesn’t matter how rare.**

**Which ship should a focus on in the next chapter?**


	11. Chapter 11

Maybe it was time to admit that Wang Jia Long otherwise known as Hong Kong was not very good at playing matchmaker. To be fair he’d never given much point in love before. He blamed his friend Emil for developing a silly high school crush on one of his father’s figures he was trying to ship. If he hadn’t, he was sure the first try would have worked flawlessly.

 

Attempt one had taken place the day the meeting was ending, and Arthur had gone to see everyone off at the airport apart from Australia and New Zealand who insisted they stay for a little while to spend time together.

 

It had been simple: get Arthur to say goodbye to him personally while China stood nearby then scare them into hugging each other with firecrackers. He’d seen things happen like that in many of manga and anime’s Japan adored so much.

 

Of course, he needed a distraction when he finally finished off his goodbye. Someone to get Arthur to speak to China so Hong Kong could set off the firecrackers.

That person was Emil. He had planned it out so well.

 

He hadn’t been expecting Emil to turn bright red the second Arthur started talking to him. He couldn’t hear what was going on, but it appeared that Emil was stuttering so much he doubted England could understand him.

 

Eventually China disappeared onto the plane before the plan could come into action. Hong Kong was ready to abandon his friend because to be honest he was seriously weirded out to think about his friend having a crush on the guy who helped raise him.

 

Lukas bailed his younger brother out by going up and talking to Arthur for him. Romania didn’t wait long to join them, and they went to sit together while they waited for delayed planes to arrive.

 

 

 

Attempt number two had been something he’d been unwittingly preparing for since last year. Pavlov theory* turned out to be pretty useful. Due to a planned prank with Alfred involving both of his guardians he’d trained them both using firecrackers and other such devises to instantly latch onto anything when they heard ‘the floor is lava’.

So, when a few days after a meeting both he and China were called out on a business trip he’d yelled ‘the floor is lava’ as he hoped they moved to hug each other before (unfortunately) stopping at the last second. He got scolded.

 

 

Attempt number three had been a tad bit more elaborate. It had involved shopping, water, paperwork, leaking government information and (unsurprisingly) firecrackers.

 

After a text from Emil pointing out even if he did get them to hug what would it accomplish, he started thinking of a more permanent event.

 

He had spent the night before the last day of the meeting in which the paperwork was going to be completed dreaming it up and by the end of the sleepless night Hong Kong felt slightly deranged.

 

At first, after much hesitation and pain he dropped the last of his beloved firecrackers into the water. The pain on his face was not forged as he complained about it to China and England claiming one of them had done it. Neither seemed particularly unhappy the firecrackers were gone but they seemed to care for what he had to say.

First of all, he blamed China.

 

‘I can’t believe you sensei,’ he told him. ‘Arthur wouldn’t do this to me.’

 

And then when China blamed England, he switched round. Telling Arthur how he couldn’t believe him. Getting them to argue may have seemed counter productive but it seemed to do the trick as a distraction when he stole their paperwork.

 

He then sent a text (telling them face to face would involve a scolding) that he hid their paperwork in a number of shops. Shopping together was something lovers do, right?

 

As it turned out they just looked separately before coming back and telling him off for ‘potentially leaking government secrets’.

 

‘I don’t know what’s gotten into you recently, aru.’ China huffed on the plane back. ‘I swear aru, England’s a bad influence on you. We won’t be going back there for a while, aru.’

 

***Basically, Pavlov rang a bell each time his dog ate so eventually even without food if he rang the bell the dog would salivate even without any food in sight. Pavlov’s theory (if I remember right) is that the senses can be fooled in to making your body have certain reactions.**

**I have given up trying to understand how people write accents.**

**Found an ongoing porteng fanfic called ‘Deep Water’. I am currently suffering from heartache as I read thirty-six chapters of an unfinished fanfic that was last updated in like. I swear I can never find hetalia fanfics that are completed, and it frustrates me.**

**Weather update, the floor is lava. Weather update, Hong Kong failed at shipping. Weather update, I should probably go to sleep. Weather update, ¯\\_( ͡• ᴗ ͡•)_/¯.**

****

** Important Stuff **

**Do you want me to do a pairing at the end of it or leave it open to your imagination?**

**(If enough people want a pairing at the end, I might attempt a vote).**

**As always comment any ships you want to see which I’ve missed out, doesn’t matter how rare.**

**Next up is the rest of the Nordics!**

**(I don’t think I’ll include Sweden and Finland in the whole ‘loving Alice/Arthur thingy’ going around but if you want to see it just ask and I’m sure I can make it work!)**


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